Writing to Inspire You!

It takes but one positive thought when given a chance to survive and thrive to overpower an entire army of negative thoughts: Robert H. Schuller.

How easy is it to start thinking positively about your life? Especially, when you've suffered years of 'put downs' and criticisms.

Let's start at the beginning. What are your memories of childhood? Are they happy memories? Do you remember getting lots of support and encouragement from the significant adults in your life? Or are your experiences clouded by feeling 'not quite good enough' or even unloved in some way? If so, you might recognise some of the following phrases or 'past tapes':

*You're so stupid why can't you think before you act?

*You will never be as clever as your brother/sister

*I'll do it, you're always so clumsy

*You'll never get anywhere in life!

These may be familiar or not. Don't worry. Start by recalling your own past tapes and write them down.

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This is a great habit to get into. By writing down all your memories - good and 
bad, you can start to make sense of how 'voices from the past' or events may be affecting your life today. You can write anything you want to. Don't worry about spelling or grammar, just 'pour your heart out'. If your recollections involve one person, then write a letter to them. Tell them how you felt as a child being subjected to their power and influence. Then describe how you feel now from the position of an adult. It's up to you if you send the letter or not. If you're not able to write through disability or some other reason, try using a tape recorder or draw a picture. It's important to get all those negative thoughts, that are trapped inside you, out into the open. Chances are when you view them in the 'cold light' of day, they won't seem so bad. At the very least, it might enable you to spot the patterns that are causing you to 'self-destruct' in your relationships and activities.    

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Reframing: changing the meaning of something.

Did you manage to find some past tapes of your own? Remember they only represent opinions. There is always two sides to every story. Have a look at the statements below and see how they can be altered:

*You're so stupid why can't you think before you act?

Children make mistakes, that's how they learn

I was only a child and I've learnt by my mistakes

Making mistakes as a child doesn't make me a stupid adult

Even adults make mistakes, they're still learning!

*You will never be as clever as your brother/sister

Children develop a range of talents, some are academic others excel at more physical things, such as sports or the creative arts

Why would I want to be a perfect 'clone' of my sibling?

Some people take longer to learn things, or learn things in a different way. Usually they are much more adept at they're chosen career as a result

I will show them that I can!

*I'll do it, you're always so clumsy

It doesn't matter if I make mistakes, I just need to try

The more I let someone do things for me, the less confidence I'll have

Some children have growing stages that often make them unbalanced not clumsy!

*I can't see you ever amounting to anything

We can achieve all sorts of things in our lives, not everyone will approve of our choices, but as long as we are happy and not hurting anyone, then who cares what others think?

You can prove them wrong!

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Now you've identified your negative thinking habits, you will start to recognise them when they pop into your head - usually, when you're attempting to make changes in your life. You can see how these thoughts can become engrained and self-limiting.

How can you get rid of them? Try the Three R's:

Rite (sic) them down in your journal 

Re-framing is one way, the other is to 'listen in' to your thoughts. This should be a lot easier now you are more aware of the sort of negative thinking that goes on in your head. When you find yourself doing this, stop and check them out. You know they don't reflect reality. Every time you have a negative thought, re-frame it and move on

Reward yourself for every negative thought you turn to a positive

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You have now taken the first step to achieving your dream. Listen in to all those negative thoughts. Remember!

*'Rite' them down

*Re-frame

*Reward yourself 

Click here for the second step: Goal Setting

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